sigh

Usually I save my tears for those times when I am alone in the night but the other night after doing something in my foot that instantly caused a black bruise and my eyes hurting like crazy it was just too much and I started to cry before I ever got into bed. Daniel asked me why I was crying and I told him there was too much to mention and I didn't want to whine about the same thing again! He told me if it was my eyes then he understood why I was crying and he was sorry he couldn't fix it but that he would be there when the time came for me to need care and that he would take care of me! It was when my heart flared up in rebellion that I knew the true problem.....I DO NOT want to need taken care of. I have been a caregiver in some form or another since I was 16. I can't imagine not doing that! I am trying to live each moment as it comes and most of the time I do pretty well but I have my days. I think I am tired.......................